Five years after this ran in Exberliner, I checked every stop. Most still hold up. Feel free to steal the whole weekend.

The above photo is a snapshot of a feature for Exberliner magazine (RIP) that I did in 2021. That’s me there – maybe I don’t walk around in a rose-print suit with a tumbler of whiskey these days, but the guy underneath hasn’t changed much. The idea of the feature was that select Berliners would give an outline of what they would do on their “perfect Berlin weekend”. Since the original never went online, I thought I’d revisit it five years on – partly to see how dated it’d feel.

While I definitely wouldn’t want to “drink myself blind” anymore like I did in the original, I haven’t changed much (I’m still not above a good party). Every stop on this itinerary still does the thing it did in 2021. Except three. But that’s not on me.

Friday

18:00 I started out with an early drink at queer neighbourhood hotspot Südblock (Admiralstr. 1–2, Kreuzberg) back then. Still would now. These days I’d swap Weinschorle for a simple beer though. I’ll be back here before the weekend’s out.

20:00 Grab a delicious and messy plate of mussels and pommes frites at Chez Michel (Adalbertstr. 83, Kreuzberg).

22:00 Hop across the street to the tables of Treffpunkt (Adalbertstr. 19, Kreuzberg), noting how so far, my weekend is pretty much exactly the same as 2021. Except these days, with the pandemic behind us, there’s one more stop to make.

23:00 I join my friend Ines on her perfect Berlin weekend for a round of karaoke at the legendary Monster Ronsons (Warschauer Str. 34, Friedrichshain) and, among a million other songs, duet on Hole’s “Celebrity Skin” with her.

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Saturday

11:00 After coffee and eggs at home, I nurse my hangover on the grassy expanse of Mariannenplatz (Kreuzberg) with a book.

15:00 Stop into my favourite museum on the Insel, the highly underrated Alte Nationalgalerie (Bodestr. 1–3, Mitte). The collection of bloody, dark and campy paintings there is somehow soothing.

18:00 Go for an early, classy-yet-punk dinner at Schwarzes Café (Kantstr. 148, Charlottenburg). The vibe is still great but there has been one big change since 2021: the loss of its 24-hour operations.

19:30 I’m still enamored by Berlin’s theater scene, so I hit up the Berliner Ensemble (Bertolt-Brecht-Platz 1, Mitte), whose reputation has only grown since 2021. Maxim Gorki (Am Festungsgraben 2, Mitte), now under Çağla Ilk after Shermin Langhoff’s postmigrant-theater era, is still good – just not the toss-up it used to be.

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Sunday

13:00 Sunday is for fancy, so I head up to the sixth floor of KaDeWe (Tauentzienstr. 21–24, Schöneberg) for oysters on a half shell and a glass of Sekt.

14:00 Hop on the S7 towards Potsdam and go swimming in Heiliger See – either at their FKK spot or on the banks of the stunning Marble Palace (Neuer Garten, Potsdam). Also dance around the park’s Pyramid – formerly a refrigerator for Kaiser Wilhelm II, built in 1792.

21:00 My mistress cinema calls, so depending on what’s screening, I head to either Freiluftkino Kreuzberg (Mariannenpl. 2) or Moviemento (Kottbusser Damm 122, Kreuzberg) for one of the best OV programs in town.

22:00 Back in the day, I would go check who’s still standing and have a last drink at Möbel Olfe (Reichenbergerstr. 177, Kreuzberg), but another casualty of the last five years: Olfe’s (and many other bars’) Sunday opening hours. There may be a benefit night but if not, I make a loop out of the weekend and close out at Südblock.

Five years on, I can defend the me of 2021. His tastes were spot on and his selections stood the test of time. In a city that is constantly changing – and it has, I see it every day – I’ll be damned if I’m not impressed by how my itinerary held up. And if the most discernible differences about me now are my alcohol choices and not having turquoise hair anymore, I’m okay with that.